Tuesday, 13 August 2019

दिल खुश कर देने वाला चुटुकुला

दिल खुश कर देने वाला चुटुकुला


पति पत्नी में जमकर झगड़ा हुआ । पति दुखी होकर एक सत्संग में चला गया । वापस आया तो पत्नी ने पूछा - कहां गए थे । पति बोला - प्रवचन सुनने । पत्नि बोली - कुछ असर पड़ा या नहीं । पति कुछ नहीं बोला और अपनी पत्नी को गोद में उठा लिया । पत्नी शरमाते हुए बोली - क्या प्रवचन में रोमांस करने के लिए कहा है ? पति ( लंबी सांस छोड़ते हुए ) - नहीं , महात्मा जी का कहना है कि अपने दुःख खुद उठाओ . . . . . . . .

Monday, 12 August 2019

आज के दिन का चुटुकुला शराबी की अंतिम इच्छा _ _ _ _ _


आज के दिन का चुटुकुला शराबी की अंतिम इच्छा _ _ _ 



  शराबी मरने ही वाला था कि उसके सामने भगवान शिव प्रकट हुए । शिव जी - तुम्हारी कोई अंतिम इच्छा है तो बताओ । शराबी - प्रभु अगले जन्म में दांत चाहे एक ही देना , पर लीवर पूरे 32 देना . . . . ! ! ! !


Sunday, 11 August 2019

आज के ताजा चुटकुले हंस - हंस के लोटपोट हो जाओगे

                      


1. लड़की वाले - आपका बेटा क्या कर रहा है ? लड़के वाले - जी वो पायलट है . लड़की वाले - कौन सी एयरलाइंस में ? लड़के वाले - जी वो शादियों में ड्रोन उड़ाता है ! ! ! !

लड़की वाले - हंस - हंस के लोटपोट ...? 



2. पप्पू अपनी बीवी के ब्यूटी पार्लर गया था , लेकिन वहां जो लिखा था , उसे पढ़कर गिरते - गिरते बचा . . . वहां लिखा था . .  यहां भगवान की रचना के साथ छेड़छाड़ की जाती है ! ! !

पप्पू  हंस - हंस के लोटपोट ...? 


Husband And Wife funny Kavi Jokes


पति आधी रात को अपनी मोटी बीवी को जगा कर बोला . . . . . घुट - घुट कर मरना सही है या फिर एकदम से मर जाना ? पत्नी - एकदम से मर जाना अच्छा होता है . . . . पति - तो अपनी दूसरी टांग भी मेरे ऊपर रखे दे और किस्सा खत्म कर मेरा . . . ! ! ! !

English


The husband woke up at midnight by waking up his fat wife.  .  .  Is it right to die of choking or die altogether?  Wife - It is good to die right away.  .  .  Husband - So put your second leg on me and finish my story.  .  .  !  !  ! !

Saturday, 10 August 2019

चुटकुले टेक्नोलॉजी के तमाशे Funny Kavi Jokes


                  चुटकुले टेक्नोलॉजी के तमाशे .......

 एक पत्नी सुबह - सुबह बिस्तर से सीधे उठकर मेकअप कर रही थी । तभी पति की भी आँख खुल गयी । पति : पगला गयी हो क्या , सुबह सुबह मेकअप . . . . . ! ! ! पत्नी : चुपचाप लेटे रहो , मुझे अपना फोन खोलना है , उसमें चेहरा पहचान कर खुलने वाला लॉक लगा दिया था और अब वह मुझे पहचान नही रहा है . . . . ! ! ! ! पति तब से बेहोश है ...

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Female Funny Jokes


Married woman- Panditji, my husband always fights with me.  Which fast should I keep for the happiness and peace of home?
 Panditji - keep a fast fast son, everything will be great.....

Friday, 9 August 2019

Santa And Police Funny Jokes



Santa knocks on the police door;  Kondarwaja is knocking - the police is the police, we are the door Santhola;  Why should I open the police;  Have to talk something.  Santa, how much are you police;  We are 3 Santa;  So talk to each other, I don't have time... 

Funny Jokes USA


The wife climbed on the table and sang a song while cleaning the house.  .  .  !  If I get you .  .  .  We will leave the era  .  .  !  Then the husband also started singing - if you fall.  .  .  We will find another one.  .  .  !  Poor husband is hospitalized!!! 

Lion Fast Food Funny Jokes


One day two lions were resting under the tree in the forest.  .  .  .  After a while a rabbit came out from there very fast.  .  .  .He asked his companion if a lion could not see him.  .  .  What was that .  .  .  .The second lion said smiling.  .  .  . MY Fast Food.  .  .  !  !  ! !

Knock knock Jokes In English


A girl saw a handsome boy at the bus stop and was fascinated and said, "I LOVE YOU." The boy placed the same scarf on the head of the girl and said - "Chant Ram's name, do not put anything in love."  But I am writing the Gayatri Mantra, read it daily before going to sleep. "(Just came and he left) When the shy girl opened the paper and saw it, it said," Akaal's blind, will you be beaten? My wife was standing behind  . these  My mobile number is. Save. Talk on the phone, and yes ........... I LOVE U 2 

Thursday, 8 August 2019

Proposal funny jokes


Pappu's funny answer to the proposal's rejection.
 Pappu (proposing to the girl) - Will you love me….
 Girl - I have seen my face, I am better than loving you.
 Pappu- Fucking will die but no one will work..... 

Farmer funny Jokes In English


Three engineers were trying to insert wires from one and a half rams of pipes, they were not successful.  A farmer was watching all these for 5 days.  On the fifth day he said: - "Should I try?  - "OK."  In a minute the rat came out with the wire from the other side.  .  .  .  The three engineers are still in a coma.  .  .  .  ? 

Wednesday, 7 August 2019

Kids Funny Jokes In English


It is very easy to get today's children to study.  Ask how?  All parents have to say only one thing to their son - "Read, study, or no father will give his daughter".. 

School Teacher Funny Jokes


Sonu brought a donkey to school Teacher - Why did you bring it?  Sonu - Ma'am, you say that I have made the biggest donkeys human.  .  .  So I thought that it should be forgotten.  .  .  .

NASA Funny Jokes In English


NASA found 10,000 tons of water on Moon.  The taste is also similar to Indian water.  Upon investigation, it is found that it is water there itself.  Which Indian women had fed the moon on Karvachauth... 

Two Friends Funny Jokes In English


   

Two friends were talking among themselves.  .  .  |  Dude, when you go to see the girl, her voice is lighter than the radio.  .  .  |  but .  .  .  After marriage, who knows the woofers?  The voice does not diminish.  .  .  !  !  !

Husband's Wife Funny Jokes In English

       Husband's Wife Funny Jokes In English




Wife - What happened, why are you sitting sad?  Husband - Hey friend don't ask, last night the news channel quote was' Let us take you straight to Delhi.  |  Bus .....  Since then I am sitting ready and not yet come...! 

Snake Funny Jokes In English

       Snake Funny Jokes In English



Nag said to the serpent - My heart is yours.  Blind in love  .  Serpent said - Leave my thoughts.  Son, my boyfriend is anaconda...! 

Father Son Jokes In English

         Father Son Jokes In English


Father (from son) - There was a time that I used to bring grocery, greens, milk and snacks for 10 rupees.  Son (from father) - Now you can not do it because Dad has CCTV camera installed there.. 

God Jokes In English

          God Jokes In English


Yamraj: - Speak, where do you go.
 Want to be in heaven or hell?
 .
 .
 ……… .. Get my mobile from the earth,
 ……… .. Get wifi attached….
 ……… .I will also stay somewhere .... 

Funny Family Jokes In English

        Funny Family Jokes In English



Amazing family


 A family had 5 sisters,


 The name of one was: Broken

 Second name -: torn

 Third Name: Faded

 Name of the fourth:

 Name of fifth: - Ghost

 One day guests came to see the girl at their house!

 Mummy asked, would you sit on the chair or on the mat?

 Guests: - On the chair

 Mummy: - Broken !!  Bring a chair,

 Guests: - No, we will sit on the mat,

 Mother: - Torn !!  Bring the mat,

 Guests: - Let it be, we will sit on the ground,

 (Guests sat on the ground)

 Mummy: - Will you drink tea or milk?

 Guests: - Tea,


 Mummy: - Faded !!  Bring tea

 Guests: - No, let us have tea, bring us milk,

 Mother: - Mary !!  Bring the milk of disguise,

 Guests: - Let us not want anything

 Just show the girl,

 Mummy: - Daughters !!  Bring the ghost,

 Guest: - Faint!!

Kavi Jokes In English

          Kavi Jokes In English



Husband with his wife - to vomit my shirt and press.
 Wife - ok
 After some time
 Husband - Has Pressed My Shirt
 Wife - No, not now
 Husband - Why?
 Wife - I am not able to vomit right now, so how do I press vomit.
 Husband unconscious..

Tuesday, 6 August 2019

College Jokes In English

              College Jokes In English



While filling the engineering form, the student asked the watchman standing nearby: how is this college? 
 Chowkidar: Great, we have done engineering from here too.. 

Teacher Student Jokes

                Teacher Student Jokes

 

   

Teacher: (from Tiku): Just intentions should be strong.  Water can also be extracted from stone.  Tiku: I can remove water even from iron, sir!  !  Teacher: How?  ?  Tiku: With a hand pump.. 

Funny Poet Joke

                  Funny Poet Joke


 One man told the poet - Two hundred men were completely calm as you sang poetry.  The poet asked - Really?  The man said - because they all slept... 

Two Friends Jokes

            

                     Two Friends Jokes


    Bunty: Dude, what is the way to get rid of mosquitoes?  Doubt: Kill a mosquito before sleeping on the night so that the rest of mosquitoes move on to their body....... And then you can sleep soundly... 

Husband And Wife Jokes

           Husband And Wife Jokes


Wife: Who among us is beautiful?
 Husband: I
 Wife: How?
 Husband: why do you go to a beauty parlor ...
 He thank God that husbands are often beautiful,
 Otherwise it would be very difficult for two or two people to go to the beauty parlor. 

Sunday, 4 August 2019

Hello Friend My Firs Blog My Intro

Hello Friend My Name is Naveen VermaThis is My First Blog My Blog Name www.Kavijokes.com I am Provide Of All Type Jokes, Status, Syari, And Funny moment Etc.